No One Should Face Homelessness for Being Who They Are

As Mental Health Awareness month comes to a close and Pride month nears, we recognize that New Yorkers with mental health struggles and LBGTQIA+ New Yorkers are likely to be navigating complex trauma that can lead to difficulties with daily duties that would secure them in their homes long-term. Your support can help vulnerable LGBTQ+ neighbors like Hala stay housed and safe to ensure mental well-being.

Hala’s Story

Hala^* never felt safe as he was growing up in rural Iraq: from an early age, he knew that he was gay and he lived in constant fear of what would happen if others found out.
 
Governed by “family honor,” Hala’s family was very strict about adherence to societal norms. Similarly, his school compelled obedience; frequently, he witnessed physical violence used to discipline students as young as 8 years of age. Through his teen years in the 1980s, he aggressively suppressed his sense of self as he became aware of honor killings and the imprisonment of gay men in response to HIV/AIDS, and as war-dominated conversations at home and in school intensified expectations of overt displays of masculinity.
 
As the cultural homophobia worsened with the introduction of the death penalty in the early 1990s, Hala found himself living in a state of hypervigilance. The ensuing cycles of shame, anxiety and depression concentrated his loneliness and fatigue. By his late twenties, he knew he was on the verge of mental collapse if he did not escape to a place where his life would not be in danger simply because he was gay.

New York City fulfilled many of his dreams almost immediately: he met other gay men who lived openly, alongside allies and families who supported and celebrated their identities.

Though it took a few more years, Hala left Iraq for the United States in 2000. Then in his early thirties, New York City fulfilled many of his dreams almost immediately: he met other gay men who lived openly, alongside allies and families who supported and celebrated their identities. He found work quickly, first in building maintenance, then as a server in a restaurant. And, Hala established his home, a studio apartment in Washington Heights – the home where he has now been living for more than 20 years. The anxiety and depression of his youth receded as he dedicated himself to mastering English and used a routine of daily walks by the water to ground himself and remain motivated and self-reflective.
 
Within the last couple of years, two setbacks intersected to unravel his equilibrium.
 
Over several months in 2023, Hala noticed his eyesight deteriorating. At work, he struggled to read receipts and labels, notice customer needs and avoid accidents. While the “readers” he got in the drugstore slightly improved things for a while, he began to feel more aware of his age.
 
One evening after work in the fall of that year, as Hala cut through a populated park in lower Manhattan, he was assaulted by a group of teenagers. A few of the teens crowded around him, jeering and laughing as they pushed him causing him to fall to the ground and hit his head. Dazed and shocked, he felt a searing sense of humiliation as he realized some of the teens were making a video of the incident and none of the bystanders said or did anything to assist him.
 
While Hala didn’t know if the teens targeted him because of his sexuality, cultural identity or age, or if his blurry vision had contributed to his fall, the incident fractured the fundamental sense of safety that he had strived so hard to cultivate since leaving Iraq. Thereafter, shame, vulnerability, anxiety and intrusive thoughts were constant companions as he navigated the city and public spaces.
 
Compounding this setback, his vision continued to decline and eventually, Hala was diagnosed with cataracts in both eyes. Unable to afford the $800 cost of the prescribed corrective lenses and too ashamed to ask a friend for the money, Hala’s work mistakes mounted until he lost the job. When he subsequently missed his first rent payment in the spring of 2025, he felt all control slipping away. He could not see a path to paying his rent again unless he had another job. Now fearing he would lose his home, Hala swallowed his shame and humiliation as he turned to a friend and borrowed money for the corrective lenses.
 
Within a few months, he found a new job as a server at a hotel earning $2,400 monthly. While he knew he would be able to cover rent payments moving forward, he still lay awake at night worrying that he would lose his home because he knew his earnings would not stretch quickly enough to cover the months of missed rent payments totaling $4,122.
 
By the time he called The Partnership, on the recommendation of a friend, his anxiety and depression were spiraling and he had lost all confidence. His sense of financial and emotional hardship fed on each other, and Hala was at his wits end to find a solution. Even his go-to strategies like walking, meditation, prayer and healthy eating were not enough to offset the depression, as he felt himself sinking to a very low place emotionally.

He told the caseworker that he needed therapy for a short time to manage the “whispers of negative thoughts” telling him that he was going to lose his home 

During his initial triage interview, Hala requested assistance with his rental arrears, as well as support for his mental health. He told the caseworker that he needed therapy for a short time to manage the “whispers of negative thoughts” telling him that he was going to lose his home and that were thwarting his customary effort to, as he says, “swim, not sink.”  The Partnership’s wellness team invited Hala to start biweekly therapy sessions, providing space for him to talk about his mental health challenges and increase the tools he has to decrease anxiety and manage stress.
 
At the same time, The Partnership housing team stepped in to provide arrears assistance. As a first step, a team member reached out to Hala’s landlord to discuss a rent settlement and negotiate a possible rent abatement. Given Hala’s long tenure in the building and the positive relationship they have built over the years, his landlord agreed to accept a one-time payment of $3,000 instead of the full $4,122 in arrears. By December, Hala’s arrears were paid in full.

Recently, he described sitting at his local coffee shop, enjoying a warm cup of coffee while watching the people coming and going outside — an experience that felt peaceful and symbolic of a fresh start.

In the months since his arrears were resolved, Hala has felt immense relief. Recently, he described sitting at his local coffee shop, enjoying a warm cup of coffee while watching the people coming and going outside — an experience that felt peaceful and symbolic of a fresh start. He knows that challenges remain: the corrective lenses are not a cure for his cataracts and the cost of surgery is beyond his means, plus he continues to navigate anxiety and depression. In the meantime, he shared that he feels “grounded again” and more stable emotionally since the immediate threat to his home has been lifted. Hala continues to work with The Partnership team to explore pathways to access medical support, acquire more tools to maintain his mental well-being and build savings.

Mental health challenges and discrimination leave many queer individuals at heightened risk of homelessness. Your gift can be the difference between someone staying housed or being on the street next month.

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